omegle

[rthy]

haha nice one

[driftism]

You: hi
Stranger: will you be my dady?
You: um, why?
Stranger: My dad died in 9/11, i need someone to molest me.
You: sorry to hear that, my dad died in 9/11 to
You: He was flying the plane when it hit the towers.
Stranger: hahahaha

[RobertoX]

Random shit! I just spoke to some girl in Japanese and then a guy in Pakistan who works for the same company as me, I thought it was a joke at first but he had to be genuine... wtf?

[Vance]

im pretending to be a 16year old girl and im talking to a 17 year old girl in holland


You: do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Stranger: yes i have
Stranger: why do you ask?
You: just trying to make conversation
Stranger: okay
Stranger: i have a boyfriend
Stranger: and u?
You: both
Stranger: a boy and a girlfriend?
You: yes
Stranger: huh
Stranger: i don't get that
You: my boyfriend is 19, and my girlfriend is my age 16
Stranger: why do you have both
You: because i want to have both. my boyfriend is great because hes older and can look after me, and my girlfriend satisfies me better sexually
Stranger: that's sick
You: have you never tried it? i mean, been with a girl?
Stranger: no, wel i have but not serious
Stranger: but with a boy and a girl at the same time


AWESOME


*edit*

i have worked out it isnt that random with connections. i found this girl again straight after she disconnected. our first conversation started like this

Stranger: i hate it here
You: why?
Stranger: everyone disconnects


this is our 2nd conversation and you can see where i figured out it was the same person

Stranger: monkey
You: i want a monkey bulter
Stranger: cool
Stranger: i want one too
You: ill call him charles and want him to look like mike tyson, you know the monkey ******
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: cool name
You: a/s/l?
Stranger: thats
Stranger: age and sex and waht?
Stranger: what
You: age/sex/location
Stranger: aha
Stranger: 17 girl the netherlands
You: i hate it here
You: everyone disconnects
You: like when after i ask girls from holland if they have been with a girl before

[svenmate]

Captain Subtle strikes again...

Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: you a 14 year old girl?
Stranger: im not
Stranger: grow up

[svenmate]

You: age? gender? location?
Stranger: 13
Stranger: boy
Stranger: finland
You: oooo, jackpot!
Stranger: & u?
You: im 65, male, from england
Stranger: ...
Stranger: bye
You: aww, come back little boy
You: you like ice cream?

[hao.]

^ hahahahaha.

[svenmate]

IM version of 4chan

[todd]

You: i cast my own dick in latex, then make a plaster mould, and now i can shuv my own dick up my ass
Stranger: well yeah
You: so where do u live?
Stranger: finland
You: why do u live in finalnd?
Stranger: I don't have a choice
You: vwhy not?
You: u in jail?
Stranger: maybe
You: thats hot
You: do u have tatoos?
Stranger: a few
You: thats hot
You: have u been bummed in the showers?


You: i cast my own dick in latex, then a plaster mould, nd now i can shuv my own dick up my ass
Stranger: oioi
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: you again
Stranger: hahaha
You: hahahah


AWAAAHH???




another one, short and sweet

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: m/f?
You: whatever u want me to be baby!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[todd]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: You wake up in a small, nondescript room. The walls, floor and ceiling are all featureless, smooth white. There is a cabinate near the bed you're lying on, and a strange metal object on the floor. It has a bizarre shape and you can't imagine what it could be used for.

What do you do?
You: stick it in my butt?
Stranger: It hurts. You start bleeding.
You: stick it in further
Stranger: The floor is now tainted in your blood. You start feeling weak.
You: so i approach the cabinet
You: and wonder around
You: feeling the furniture as if to find my own salvation
You: and then
You: i find one of the legs of the table
Stranger: You notice a faint light coming out of the cabinet.
You: and i stick it in my but too
Stranger: You're butt is full, you cannot stick more stuff inside it. Wanna try the mouth ?
You: nope
You: prefer to keep trying to butt actually. u would be surpised how much junk i can fit in my trunk
Stranger: Your butt is now level 2, you can store the table leg.
You: and then
You: as if the world around me is closing in,
You: the whole room is sucked into my butt
Stranger: You are sucked into your own butt.
You: and that is how one creates a wormhole.




You: can i haveu r mobile number
You: u sound hot
Stranger: no, sorry
Stranger: I am indeed hot.
You: ill give u mine?
Stranger: sorry
You: PLEASE
You: ILL MISS YOU
You: dont go?!
Stranger: I'm everywhere
You: is this.....god?
Stranger: almost
You: JESUS
You: ITS JESUS
You: HES BACK
Stranger: shhh
You: AND HES ON OMEGLE
Stranger: I was trying to live a quiet life
You: oh sorry dude.
Stranger: it's hard being the son of god you know
Stranger: people expect so much from you
You: i can imagine bro
You: hey
You: jesus
You: since u can do miracles and all
Stranger: -If god exist, why is there wars ?
Stranger: DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO MAKE A MIRACLE
You: can u do my uni work for me?
You: get fucked, i made a miracle the other day
You: it was hella easy
Stranger: What kind of miracle ?
You: well
You: i bought this pancake mix, right,
You: and it was in this little container
You: and it said
You: just add water
You: and i had no water
You: so i made some water
You: i pissed in the bottle and then it made the pancake mix worked and they were the best pancakes iv ever had
Stranger: that's an easy miracle, try solving world hunger or bringing someone back to life instead