Please dont take any of this post offensively, you seem to have the right idea but it sounds like you havent looked into stuff quite as extensively as you should.
Firstly, TODA make great parts, but just because you strap some sick stuff into your 4age doesnt mean you can blip away to 10,000. With these parts that you have suggested i can see a small rev limit raise being acceptable (take more advantage of bigger cams) but the weak points in your motor (in regards to a "rev raise") havent been adressed. Things like Bearings, Fasteners, Oil Delivery, Conrods etc all play a much bigger part than forged pistons when it comes to a high revving motor that will last.
As for a ECU i would reccomend either microtech (i sell them) or adaptronic. Both are widely available, are affordable and have good tuning capabilities.
Forged pistons are considerably stronger than cast pistons, but the real gain in using a toda forged piston will be the considerable compression ratio raise.
Lastly, if its not really a race car than maybe you dont really need to rev to 10,000 and make 220 rwhp. Your not trying to take out the N2 cup, so maybe its a better idea to drop that final goal to 8500 or 9000 (easily achievable with off the shelf parts) and setlle for 160-180 hp. This will make everything last SO much longer, and will ultimately provide a more fun car for you. And 160 hp atw in a small light rwd car.... more than enough to get yourself into trouble, trust me.
